Three weeks ago I embarked on my biggest journey to date. I quit my job, packed up my life and moved to the other end of the country. I didn’t really know what it would entail, other than that it would be physical, I’d meet new people and I’d need to find a job.
These first few weeks have been a bit of a rollercoaster. There have been some incredible moments.. sunset surfs, sunrise SUPs, jumping around in the waves like children. But there have also been quite a few lows.
I think the hardest thing for me has been all of the pressure I’ve been putting on myself, mixed with all of the uncertainties. The course itself has been physically demanding. We have been out in the water pretty much everyday and I have been learning to surf as a complete beginner. On top of this we need to do shadowing hours, I have to practice my swimming and I needed to get a job as so far I have just been living off my savings. Don’t get me wrong, it’s all been a lot of fun, but it’s certainly not easy.
I also struggle a lot with new people. Moving somewhere I don’t know anyone is hard. I often find it difficult to connect with people to begin with and feel a lot of it stems back to a childhood of caring far too much about what other people think. I am an introvert, I don’t like busy places and I struggle trying to have conversations with more than one person at a time, so this whole situation has been a lot and felt pretty overwhelming at times.
The last few weeks have definitely been emotional and there have been quite a few tears. For people who don’t know me very well.. I cry, a lot. I cry at sad films, at happy films, when things go wrong, when things go right. I cry for all kinds of emotions and I’ve found it’s always better just to let it out, though it does seem to make some people feel uncomfortable at times.
I can’t help but think ahead to where I might end up after the course, though I didn’t go into it with a set goal in mind. When I signed up, I was just at a point in my life where I needed a big change and didn’t really have anything tying me to where I was in the country. I’ve always felt pressure in life to have a plan, but I’m trying to learn to live without one, go with the flow and take things as they come.
This weekend I knew I was in need of a bit of a reset. Friday night was spent on the phone to the bestie playing board games online (definitely a happy place of mine), followed by a 19km solo hike on Saturday morning. It’s been so long since I’ve been out, especially on my own, and I’d forgotten just how much I need it. The peace and quiet, the headspace, time to process the whirlwind that I’ve thrown myself into.
So right now I just want to try take it a day at a time. I need to stop putting as much pressure on myself and start to find those home comforts. Though I find it hard meeting people, I have been lucky enough to make some amazing friends, from the girls on my course to beautiful humans I’ve met through Instagram.
More sunset dips, hikes, books and headspace.
Lisa Outdoors 